Translated by: John Murphy








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Le Logotron

Jean-Pierre Petit

Jean-Pierre Petit

Jean Pierre Petit
Traduit par:

Translated by: John Murphy

Tradotto da: Elisa Gaspari ed Elio Flesia

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1

A mon avis nous courons vers un véritable Wall Street linguistique
In my opinion we're going directly towards a linguistic Wall Street crash

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Secondo me ci stiamo avviando verso una crisi linguistica stile Wall Street.

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2

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3

PROLOGUE
PROLOGUE
PROLOGO

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Nouvelles du jour chaîne 206
Daily news channel 206

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Novità del giorno canale 206

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C'est dingue. Si on veut savoir un peu ce qui se passe, il faut réussir à tenir pendant les quatre heures du journal télévisé
It's crazy. If we want to know something about what is happening, we have to be able to wade through four hours of television news

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E’pazzesco. Se vogliamo sapere un po’ciò che sta accadendo, dobbiamo riuscire a sopportare quattro ore di telegiornale.

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Tu as vu ceux-là qu'est-ce qu'ils se mettent !
Do you see that lot, what are they're putting on!

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Hai visto quelli, quanto si picchiano !

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Ca doit être le parti de Mhadafi contre les néo-krafkiens
That must be a match between the Mhadafi and the neo-Krafkiens

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Questo deve essere il partito di Mhadafi contro i neo-Krafkiani.

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Tu crois ?
You reckon?

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Credi?

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Mais non, ce sont des Poloks du sud. Je les reconnais à leurs fusils d'assaut Krachkof.
No, they're southern Poloks. I recognise them because of their Krachkof assault rifles.

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No, sono Poloks del sud. Li riconosco dai loro fucili d’assalto Krachkof.

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Mais, les néo-krafkiens ont aussi des fusils d'assaut Krachkof, non ?
But the neo-Krafkians also have Krachkof assault rifles don't they?

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Ma anche i neo-krafkiani hanno dei fucili d’assalto Krachkof, no?

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Quelle boucherie !
What butchery!

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Che massacro!

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Tout le monde a des fusils d'assaut Krachkov… Je ne sais plus…
Everyone has Krachkof assault rifles… I don't understand anymore…

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Tutti hanno dei fucili d’assalto Krachkof… non capisco più…

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4

Le président du groupe des républicains démocrates, progressistes et indépendants vous parle
The president of the democratic, republican, progressive and independents group is speaking to you

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Vi parla il presidente del gruppo dei repubblicani democratici, progressisti ed indipendenti.

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Tu écoutes ? Je n'entends rien !
Are you listening? I can't hear anything!

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Stai ascoltando? Io non sento nulla.

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Non, j'enlève le son. Comme cela, c'est plus marrant. Ils ont l'air tellement stupides.
No, I've turned the sound off. It's more fun like that. They look so stupid.

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No, ho tolto l’audio. Così è più spassoso. Sembrano tanto stupidi.

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BLANCA la lessive VRAIE
BLANCA, the REAL washing powder

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BLANCA, il VERO detersivo.

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DANEKEN la bière qui est VRAIMENT une bière
DANEKEN, the beer that is REALLY beer.

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DANEKEN, la birra che è VERAMENTE birra.

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Coupe ça !
Turn that off!

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Cambia canale!

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Les VERITABLES rillettes du Mans.
The VERITABLE potted meat.

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I VERI cicciolini di Le Mans.

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L'opération vérité…
Operation truth…

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L’operazione verità…

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Flash information : ce matin, attentat à la bibliothèque nationale. Des inconnus se sont introduits dans la salle de lecture et ont sauvagement matraqué le bibliothécaire. Puis ils ont mis le feu aux ouvrages avant de prendre la fuite. L'incendie a pu être maîtrisé.
Newsflash: this morning there was an explosion at the national library. An unknown group entered the reading room and savagely hit the librarian, then set fire to the books before fleeing. The fire is now under control.

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Ultime notizie: questa mattina, attentato alla biblioteca nazionale. Degli sconosciuti si sono introdotti nella sala di lettura ed hanno picchiato selvaggiamente il bibliotecario. Poi hanno appiccato il fuoco ai libri prima di fuggire. L’incendio è stato domato.

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5

A la bibliothèque nationale ? Bizarre...
At the national library? That's odd…

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Alla biblioteca nazionale? Strano…

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BISCOTTA, la biscotte qui est VRAIMENT une biscotte
BISCOTTA, the biscuit that is TRULY a biscuit.

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BISCOTTA, il biscotto che è VERAMENTE un biscotto.

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Le match, c'est sur quel canal ?
What channel is the match on?

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L’incontro… su che canale?

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Tu es dessus, mais il te faut orienter ton antenne vers le réémetteur
This one, but you'll have to turn the aerial towards the transmitter.

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Su questo, ma devi orientare la tua antenna verso il trasmettitore.

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La charité, s'il vous plait
Charity, please

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Carità, per favore.

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Laisse tomber. Ils ne peuvent ni te voir, ni t'entendre. Ils ont leurs lunettes à cristaux liquides et leurs écouteurs, le tout en stéréo...
Don't bother. They can neither see you nor hear you. They're wearing their liquid crystal glasses and their headphones, all in stereo…

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Lascia perdere. Loro non possono né vederti, né sentirti. Hanno i loro occhiali a cristalli liquidi e le loro cuffie, il tutto in stereo…

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Mais, que fait celui-là avec sa canne blanche ? Il est aveugle ?
What's that fellow doing with a white cane? Is he blind?

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Ma cosa fa quello col bastone bianco? E’ cieco?

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Non. Tu l'entends ? Il doit simplement regarder un match de foot sur ses lunettes. C'est pour cela qu'il a besoin d'une canne blanche pour rentrer cher lui
No. Can you hear it? He's just watching a football match on his glasses. That's why he needs a white stick so that he can find his way home

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No. Ti spiego. Sta semplicemente guardando un incontro di calcio sui suoi occhiali. E’ per questo che ha bisogno di un bastone bianco per rincasare.
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Joli but !
Good goal!

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Bel goal!

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Oh, dis-donc, six plombs ont déjà sonné. Il nous faut quitter au plus vite le quartier des CONFORTABLES, si nous ne voulons pas nous faire ramasser par une patrouille
Hey, six chimes have struck already. We'd better leave the COMFORTABLES zone quickly if we don't want to be picked up by a patrol.

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Oh, senti, le campane hanno già suonato sei volte. Dobbiamo lasciare al più presto il quartiere dei CONFORTEVOLI, se non vogliamo farci raccattare da una pattuglia.

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6

Deux emballages pour un yaourt ? Et le truc jaune c'est quoi ?
Two packages for one yoghourt? And that yellow thing, what is it?

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Due imballi per uno yogurt? E quella cosa gialla, cos’è?

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...des attentats similaires se sont produits dans différents pays
…other, similar attacks have taken place in various countries

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…attentati simili si sono verificati in diversi paesi.
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Je suppose que ça doit être le mode d'emploi avec la carte de garantie
I expect that they're instructions for use and the guarantee.

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Suppongo che queste siano le istruzioni d’uso e la garanzia.
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Cernés, les extrémistes n'ont pas hésité à se donner la mort
Surrounded, the extremists didn't hesitate to kill themselves

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Accerchiati, gli estremisti non hanno esitato ad uccidersi.

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Ben, qu'est-ce c'est que cela ?
Eh, what's that?

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Beh, cos’è questo?

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C'est écrit en arabe, en pakistanais et en allemand...
It's written in Arabic, Pakistani and German…

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E’ scritto in arabo, pachistano e tedesco…

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Nous rappelons qu'en deux jours c'est le onzième attentat visant des BIBLIOTHEQUES
We remind you that this is the eleventh attack on LIBRARIES in two days

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Ricordiamo che è l’undicesimo attacco in due giorni alle BIBLIOTECHE.

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QUOI ?!
WHAT?!

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COSA?!

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Qu'est-ce qu'ils ont après les BIBLIOTHEQUES !?
What have they got against LIBRARIES!?

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Ma perché ce l’hanno con le BIBLIOTECHE?

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7

Mais, qui sont ceux-là ? Les autonomistes du Mont Saint Michel ?
And who are they? St Michael's Mount autonomists?

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Ma chi sono quelli? Gli autonomisti di Monte San Michele?

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Dans les inscriptions laissées sur les murs, certaines portaient N'IMPORTE QUOI et d'autres RIEN
Among the inscriptions painted on the walls, some were NONSENSE and others didn't say ANYTHING.

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Tra le scritte lasciate sui muri, alcune erano ASSURDITA’ ed altre SENZA SENSO
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Parmi les terroristes qui se sont fait sauter avec la bibliothèque de Boston, on compte le professeur Tomsky, le célèbre linguiste
Among the terrorists who blew themselves up at the Boston library was the famous linguist Professor Tomsky

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Tra i terroristi che si sono fatti esplodere con la biblioteca di Boston si annovera il professor

Tomski, famoso linguista.

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Mais CA ne veut rien dire
But THAT doesn't mean anything

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Ma QUESTO non significa nulla.

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Tu l'as DIT
You SAID it

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L’hai detto.

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Je crois que je commence à comprendre. On parlait ces temps-ci d'un groupe d'anarcho-linguistes. Je croyais que c'était une blague, mais il semble qu'ils soient bel et bien passés à l'action
I think I'm starting to understand. People have been talking lately of an anarcho-linguist group. I thought it was a joke but it seems they've really begun their action

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Credo d’iniziare a capire. Si è parlato ultimamente di un gruppo di anarco-linguisti. Credevo che fosse uno scherzo, ma sembra che siano di fatto passati all’azione.
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Flash information...
News flash…

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Ultime notizie…

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Attends, écoute
Wait, listen

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Aspetta, ascolta.

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Notre correspondant à la frontière sino-mongolienne a pu joindre un groupe d'anarcho-linguistes
Our correspondent on the Sino-Mongolian frontier has managed to enter into contact with the anarcho-linguists.

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Il nostro corrispondente alla frontiera cinese-mongolica ha potuto raggiungere un gruppo di anarco-linguisti.

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Nous sommes une organisation internationale ayant des ramifications dans tous les pays et comptant dans ses rangs des linguistes, des logiciens, des sémanticiens et des glossématiciens
We are an international organisation with cells in every country and with linguists, logicians, semanticians and glossomaticians in our ranks

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Siamo un’organizzazione internazionale che ha ramificazioni in tutte le nazioni e che conta nei suoi ranghi dei linguisti ed altri specialisti di logica, di semantica e di glossematica.
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C'est curieux, d'habitude quand des extrémistes rencontrent un reporter ils lui bandent les yeux
That's odd, usually when extremists meet a reporter they blindfold him

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E’ curioso, generalmente quando gli estremisti incontrano un reporter gli bendano gli occhi.

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Là ils lui ont mis un sparadrap sur la bouche !
There they've put a sticking plaster on his mouth!

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Là gli hanno messo un cerotto sulla bocca!

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8

Nous avons décidé de frapper sans pitié ceux qui parleront pour ne rien dire, où nous voudrons et quand nous voudrons.
We have decided to strike those who speak to say nothing without pity, as we wish and where we wish.

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Abbiamo deciso di picchiare senza pietà quelli che parleranno a vanvera, dove e quando vorremo.

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C'était Jean-Claude Bidouille, de tf89
That was Jean-Claude Gizmo of TF89

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Era Jean-Claude Tirabidoni, del tf89.

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Mon dieu, ce costume, cette cravate, ça ne s'arrange pas
My goodness, that suit and that tie, they don't help.

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Dio Mio, questo vestito, questa cravatta, sempre peggio.

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Les commentaires sur cette affaire
Commentary on this affair

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I commenti su questo fatto

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Excusez-moi
Excuse me

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Scusatemi

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Euh... Oui... Non... Voilà, c'est tout
Er… Yes… No… That's it

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Ehm… Sì… No… Ecco, è tutto

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Allons à l'Institut. On en saura peut-être plus là-bas
Let's go to the Institute. Maybe we'll find out more there.

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Andiamo all’Istituto. Forse lì ne sapremo di più.

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Tu as vu ce type !? Il est fou, j'ai failli lui rentrer dedans
Did you see that man!? He's mad, I almost drove into him.

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Hai visto quel tipo!? E’ pazzo, per poco non lo ho investito.

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9

Je crois que c'est une nouvelle secte, dont les membres ont décidé de porter des lunettes noires et des boules QUIES
I think it's a new sect whose members have decided to wear dark glasses and EARPLUGS.

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Credo si tratti di una nuova setta i cui membri hanno deciso di indossare degli occhiali neri e dei tappi auricolari.

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VOUS ETES ICI
YOU ARE HERE

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VOI SIETE QUI

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IGNOREZ CE PANNEAU
IGNORE THIS SIGN

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IGNORATE QUESTO CARTELLO

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INSTITUT DE LITTERATRONIQUE
LITERATRONICS INSTITUTE

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ISTITUTO DI LITTERATRONICA

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Monsieur... euh... du gouvernement
Gentleman…er…of the government

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Signore… ehm… del governo

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Chu-ut !
Sshhh!

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Sss!

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Mesdames, messieurs, vous avez entendu hier, à la télévision, les menaces proférées par ce groupe de linguistes dissidents. Nous avons de bonnes raisons de prendre ces menaces très au sérieux et nous avons immédiatement pris des mesures visant à assurer la protection de toutes les personnes susceptibles d'utiliser les médias
Ladies and gentlemen, on television yesterday you heard the threats proffered by this group of dissident linguists. We have good reason to take their threats very seriously and have taken immediate measures to ensure the protection of all persons likely to use the media.

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Signore e signori, avete sentito ieri, alla televisione, le minacce proferite da questo gruppo di linguisti dissidenti. Abbiamo buone ragioni per prendere queste minacce molto seriamente ed abbiamo immediatamente preso delle misure volte ad assicurare la protezione di tutte le persone che è probabile che usino i media.

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Toute personne amenée à faire une déclaration publique sera obligatoirement dotée de cet équipement spécial
Anyone who is required to make a public declaration will be obliged to use this special equipment.

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Ogni persona invitata a fare una dichiarazione pubblica sarà obbligatoriamente dotata di questo equipaggiamento speciale…

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Dont l'usage va être généralisé à l'ouest comme à l'est
Its use will be generalised in both the west and the east.

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…il cui uso sarà generalizzato sia ad ovest che ad est.

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Mais !? C'est un masque de carnaval !
But!? That's a carnival mask!

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Ma!? E’una maschera di carnevale!

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Serons équipés en priorité les présentateurs radio et télévision et les personnalités du monde politique
Priority will be given to radio and television presenters and political personalities.

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Saranno attrezzati innanzi tutto i presentatori di radio e televisione e le personalità del mondo politico.

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Hum... merci...
Hmm… thankyou…

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Hum… grazie…

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10

Voici la carte des attentats des jours derniers. Comme vous le voyez, c'est beaucoup plus important que ce qui a été annoncé par voie de presse. La majorité de ces attentats n'a pas été revendiquée, ce qui diminue singulièrement nos chances d'endiguer cette vague. Nous pensons qu'ils sont le fait de la frange dure des ANARCHO-LINGUISTES, les MUTISTES, ainsi nommés parce qu'ils refusent toute communication et agissent de manière anonyme.
Here is a map showing where the latest attacks have taken place. As you can see, there have been many more than announced in the press. There has been no claim of reponsibility for the majority of these attacks, which seriously limits the possibilities of stopping them. We believe they have been undertaken by the hardline wing of the ANARCHO-LINGUISTS, the MUTISTS, so named because they refuse all communication and act anonymously.

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Ecco la mappa degli attentati degli ultimi giorni. Come vedete, ce ne sono stati molti di più di quelli che sono stati annunciati dalla stampa. La maggior parte degli attentati non è stata rivendicata, ciò che diminuisce seriamente le nostre possibilità di arrestare quest’ondata. Riteniamo che siano la frangia dura degli ANARCO-LINGUISTI, i MUTISTI, così detti perché rifiutano ogni comunicazione ed agiscono in modo anonimo.
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Curieux. Moi quand je n'ai rien à dire, je le dis...
Most peculiar, when I've got nothing to say, I say so…

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Strano. Io, quando non ho nulla da dire, lo dico…

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Nous comptons sur vos compétences en linguistique et en logique pour voir si, au delà ce cette crise de civilisation, nous ne serions pas confrontés à une véritable CRISE DU LANGAGE
We are counting on your competence in linguistics and logic to see, above and beyond this crisis of civilisation, if we aren't confronted with a veritable LANGUAGE CRISIS

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Contiamo sulle vostre competenze in linguistica ed in logica per vedere se, oltre a questa crisi di civiltà, non saremmo posti di fronte ad una vera CRISI DEL LINGUAGGIO
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LE PARADOXE DE RUSSEL
RUSSEL'S PARADOX

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IL PARADOSSO DI RUSSEL

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Le représentant du gouvernement quitte l'Institut de Littératronique
The government representative is leaving the Literatronic Institute

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Il rappresentante del governo lascia l’Istituto di Litteratronica

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Bien. Quelqu'un a-t-il quelque chose à dire ?
OK. Has anyone anythng to say?

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Bene. Qualcuno ha qualcosa da dire?

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11

BANG !
BANG!

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BANG!

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!?..
!?..

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!?

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Professeur... Vous vouliez dire quelque chose ?
Professor…do you wish to say something?

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Professore… vorrebbe dire qualcosa?

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Euh... non... je voulais simplement savoir où on pouvait ce procurer cet... équipement
Erm..no..I simply wanted to know where we could get this… equipment

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Ehm… no… volevo semplicemente sapere dove potremmo procurarci questa… attrezzatura
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Il y a un marchand de farces et attrape près de l'institut. Je crois qu'il vend des masques...
There is a joke shop near the Institute. I believe they sell masks…

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C’è un negozio di scherzi nei pressi dell’istituto. Credo che venda delle maschere…

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Vite ! Il n'y en aura peut-être pas pour tout le monde...
Hurry! There probably won't be enough for everyone…

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Presto! Probabilmente non ne avrà abbastanza per tutti…

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Voilà des gens qui n'ont guère confiance dans leur langage. Mon Dieu, quelle panique !...
Look at that, those are people who don't have much confidence in their language. Goodness, what a panic!..

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Ecco delle persone che si fidano ben poco della propria lingua. Dio mio, che panico!

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Vous connaissez, vous, un langage qui permet de ne jamais dire de sottises ?
And you, do you know a language that makes it impossible to speak nonsense?

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E voi, conoscete una lingua che consenta di non dire mai delle sciocchezze?

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12

La THEORIE DES ENSEMBLES est la pierre de Touche de tous les langages. Tout est une question de CLASSEMENT. Il y a l'ensemble des choses vraies et l'ensemble des choses fausses. Il y a CE QUI EST et CE QUI N'EST PAS. Il y a L'ENSEMBLE VIDE  où on mettra le RIEN.
SET THEORY is the touchstone of all languages. It's all a question of CLASSIFICATION. There is an set of things that are true and a set of things that are false. There is WHAT IS and WHAT IS NOT. There is the EMPTY SET where we put NOTHINGNESS

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La TEORIA DEGLI INSIEMI è la pietra di Paragone di tutte le lingue. E’tutta una questione di CLASSIFICAZIONE. Esistono l’insieme delle cose vere e l’insieme delle cose false. Esiste CIO’ CHE E’ e CIO’CHE NON E’. Esiste L’INSIEME VUOTO dove metteremo il NIENTE.

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VRAI FAUX
TRUE FALSE

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VERO FALSO

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Avec le temps, le langage a dû s'enrichir de nombreuses formes parasitaires. J'estime qu'il suffit de le débarrasser de ces sédiments accumulés pour retrouver, intact, son FONDEMENT, toujours présent
As time has passed, language has been enriched with many parasitic forms. I believe that we just need to get rid of this accumulated sediment to once more find, intact, the FOUNDATION, still present

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Col tempo, la lingua si è arricchita di numerose forme parassitarie. Credo che basti sbarazzarsi di questi sedimenti accumulati per ritrovare, intatto, il suo FONDAMENTO, sempre presente.

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La question de base est de POUVOIR CLASSER TOUTE CHOSE dans des ENSEMBLES, le critère étant "APPARTIENT A..." ou "N'APPARTIENT PAS A...", tout le reste n'étant que LITTERATURE
The basic question is THE ABILITY TO CLASSIFY EVERYTHING into SETS, the criterion being "BELONGS TO…" or "DOES NOT BELONG TO…", all the rest is just LITERATURE

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La questione di base è POTER CLASSIFICARE OGNI COSA in degli INSIEMI, stante il criterio “APPARTIENE A…” o “NON APPARTIENE A….”, tutto il resto non essendo che LETTERATURA
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Selon vous, jeter les bases d'un LANGAGE consiste à commencer par tout classer très soigneusement
According to you then, laying the bases of a LANGUAGE consists of beginning with a very carefully classification of everything

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Secondo voi, gettare le basi di una LINGUA consiste nel classificare tutto con cura

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Pour CATALOGUER toutes les choses de l'Univers, existantes, ou simplement possibles, on pourrait utiliser des... livres ?
To CATALOGUE everything in the Universe, existing or simply possible, we could use… books?

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Per CATALOGARE tutte le cose dell’Universo, esistenti o semplicemente possibili, si potrebbero utilizzare dei… libri?

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Si vous voulez. Et on peut même classer à leur tour ces livres en les dotant d'un index où ils seraient cités, en sachant qu'un ouvrage peut aussi se citer lui-même, figurer dans son propre index.
If you like. We could even classify books in their turn by giving them an index in which they'll be cited, remembering that a work can also cite itself, figure in its own index.

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Se volete. E si possono anche classificare a loro volta questi libri dotandoli di un indice nel quale sarebbero citati, sapendo che un’opera può anche citare sé stessa, figurare nel suo proprio indice.

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13

Mais il n'est pas obligatoire qu'un ouvrage se cite lui-même
But it isn't obligatory that a work cite itself.

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Ma non è obbligatorio che un’opera citi sè stessa

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Bien sûr. Mais la THEORIE DES ENSEMBLES ayant réponse à TOUT, nous créerons une nouvelle
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